Monday, September 27, 2010
Entry 2 : Her Life
Initially, I promised myself to put this entry yesterday, as I want my 3 entries (insya-Allah) to be in three straight days.. Anyway, please forgive me for that..
I have a friend.. back from university. We were not really close then, but few activities put us in a common situation.. We didn't really talk to each other that much but sometimes, she would come to me to talk about her problem, or just to share her anxiety about study and exams and stuff like that..
She got married earlier than me.. and she was really really proud about that. I didn't know why, then.. but from a closer friend, I finally knew that this friend of mine would always do things like I did.. trying to change herself to be like me.. but yet, we were not that close.. in fact, I would always try to avoid her as much as I could since we couldn't get along that well... I don't know.. I just couldn't be that close with her for a long period.. unlike other friends of mine like Asma', Shade, Maton and etc..
We seldom talk to each other, too.. She invited me to her wedding, but I couldn't attend because I was on-call.. and then, I invited her to my wedding but she was busy with her stuff as well.. few months later, she called me, just to inform me that she was pregnant.. and she asked me whether I've been pregnant too.. I couldn't remember when was it but I'm pretty sure, it was after 6 months of my marriage.. I was sad back then, because I felt as if she was trying to show-off.. but never mind, I was happy for her... and after few weeks, I heard from a dear friend that she had a miscarriage.. she was depressed and that affected her work-performance.. Okay... that was not good, I thought.. but, I didn't call her to console her or what-so-ever, since I think she wouldn't want to be disturbed by me, anyway.. but deep in my heart, I pity her, too..
I've not been hearing any news from her since early this year.. and suddenly last Thursday, she called me.. she asked me whether I could help her to be transferred to KL/Sgor area, since I am now working in headquarters of our ministry. Erm... I was speechless initially.. WHY ME?? And then, she started to open-up..
She was currently pregnant, about 20 weeks of POA.. has been in a long-distance relationship since her husband is working in Klang Valley.. and currently they are having serious marriage problem.. because of her busy daily life as a doctor (on-calls, clinics and weekend on-calls), she needed to stay in her workplace (not KL, not Selangor, not Putrajaya).. and, she has not been in contact with her husband for almost a month.. she did call the husband, but no answer.. currently, they are communicating through a third person (org tengah)... I am not sure what are the problems among them, but I think this is too much.. how come a husband and a wife not talking to each other, whereas they are able to do so via phone calls, email, or at least meet up once a while, if long-distance relationship is the issue??? this is just at the verge of disaster.. a broken marriage.. and what should be next?? divorce? what about the baby that she is carrying? should their marriage being sacrificed for her profession??? this is something I cannot tolerate..
I am trying to help her by telling her what is the next step to be done for her to get transferred.. I can't do much on the counseling of marriage, since I myself didn't know who is her husband.. further more, I have not been in the situation. Thanks to Allah for that.. and thanks to my husband for endless support, although I also did some sacrifice for a better future.. but it's worth the effort..
As for now, I am hoping that she could handle the stress.. It's terrible and I just can't imagine if that happen to me.. Nauzubillahi min zaalik..
To you, my friend.. be strong and have faith in Allah.. whatever the outcomes would be, just don't fade your imaan by blaming Allah..