Catching Up...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahiim...
Assalamualaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh..

Okay.. I decide to update this blog today because Facebook is no longer allowed for access in my office.. hehehe.. frankly, the day would be "longer" than previously.. hehehe.. but a good point is that the concentration towards work would be more.. I admit, Facebook had stole away 50% of my concentration towards work.. hahahaha! A confession of a government servant whom is working in the office.. But, I would like to defend myself by saying that none of my tasks / jobs were left behind incomplete. Hehehe.. points taken? Takpe, takde Facebook then blogspot kan ade.. huhuhu.

As for new working environment, I would have to say that I am adapting quite okay here.. For the last 3 weeks, all the staff and senior colleagues are helping me a lot so that I could understand how all the jobs are done.. Alhamdulillah, I think I would be able to pick up the work process.. Attending the group meeting and also the CPG team discussion, I would say this would be a challenge for me to improve myself. Fortunately, the word "evicence-based medicine (EBM)" is not a new phrase to me.. this is the field I am dealing with now.. It demands a high commitment in terms of critical thinking and action base on facts.. I like it..

But.. the only flaw that I couldn't accept is the lack of parking area.. URGH!!! tak boleh terima, okay?! Just imagine, the distance from my house to my office is only 3-4km.. tapi, kena kuar awal 45 minit to get a parking.. tu pon main blasah je parking tepi jalan.. parking facilities memang hampeh la kat sini.. huh?! Bila my husband balik, jangan harap le nak suruh saye bawak keta ke ofis.. He has to be the driver.. Time tu la nak bermanja-manja kan.. hehehe.. by being my "supir"?

Insya-Allah, tak lama lagi dapat le kuarters.. sekarang ni stay ngan my parents dulu.. maybe during Ramadhan or after Aidilfitri, we'll be moving in to a new house.. kuarters la tapi.. but Insya-Allah, berbaloi..

What di I do during my free time? Hehehe.. since I don't have to do on-call anymore, I spend it with reading.. I finished reading "Natrah : Cinta, Rusuhan, Air Mata".. A very good book indeed.. Highly recommended to those who has the interest to know the real history behind it.. anyway, Natrah passed away in 2009, succumbed to Leukemia.. Right now, I'm reading My Sister's Keeper, a book recommended by a friend.. Interesting, isn't it..

So, that's all for now.. Will try to find time for further update..

New Chapter

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...

Assalamualaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh...

My husband has been reminding me for thousand times already.. Blog ini telah terabai! Huhuhu... Padahal kebelakangan ni takde lah busy sgt.. For update, saye dah berpindah ke Putrajaya.. kuarters still tak dapat, so menumpang ngan Ummi n Abah dulu.. sekarang ni kerja within office hour, not involve with patients, no on-call, but kind of bored and the satisfaction was not yet felt… Maybe sebab takde kerja yang betul2 being assigned to me yet.. Ade pro and cons in doing this..

Pro :
1. takyah on-call.. so my weekend is for me to spend with my family. Boleh attend wedding without thinking of weekend call.. takyah request weekend off from specialist. And the best part is, tidur sentiasa cukup (6-8 hours per day).
2. Near to family – since my family is in Putrajaya and my in-laws are in Shah Alam, the distance is very much lesser compared to previously. Kalau ade ape2 emergency, easier for me to get help and support, so also should there be any emergency in the family, I can always be by their side..
3. No extended working hour – previously, I’ll go to work at 7.30am and back home (if no on-call) at 6.30pm average.. In certain good day, boleh la balik pukul 5.30pm. Balik lewat tu dah biasa dah.. Kadang2 bukan sebab kerja banyak pon, tapi sebab tunggu the on-call people to pass-over.. or sometimes tunggu boss dtg round.. paling tak best kalo kena balik lewat after post-call.. But now, kalo balik lewat pon maybe sebab meeting habis lewat..
4. Waktu solat terjaga – Hehehe… ni memang takleh nak blame pon kalo solat lewat dulu, sbb lewat pon sebab patient tak stabil and kena make sure patient tak mati dulu.. but at least nowadays, boleh solat dalam waktu. Insya-Allah, will try to maintain that..
5. Ade work-space sendiri – In my office, I have my own workplace.. Cubicle yang agak luas.. Takyah bilik pon takpe lagi sebab cubicle ni dah cukup besar.. I have my own PC and cabinet to put my things.. Cuma nak kena decorate and touch-up sket la..

Cons :
1. Skill hilang – actually, saye sayang my skill as a Pediatrics MO.. intubate patient, IV cannulation, arterial line cannulation, talking and explaining to patients’ parents..  duh… even determining patients’ problems pon need skills.. but to overcome this “feeling of emptiness”, maybe I need to do locum.
2. Less moving – duduk je kat office, rase cam kematu punggung and gelisah.. especially kalo tgh takde kerja.. urgh.. kalo dok kat spital, memang kena jalan2 sampai lenguh.. hahahah! But to overcome this, maybe kena ajak husband go for a jog or brisk-walking in the evening or weekend..
3. Paperwork, paperwork, paperwork – Urgh.. I hate paperworks! But what can I say?! This job is mainly on doing paperwork, proposals, letters and etc… Maybe I can kind-of ignore the boredom by reading, since one of my task is to read A LOT OF MEDICAL JOURNALS!! Huhuhu.. macam balik ke library time study mase undergrad dulu..

Kadang2 datang terpikir jugak, am I doing the right choice? Is this what I really want? How do I make it as fun as working with children? Hmmm… tapi bile fikir panjang dan panjang dan panjang lagi, everything happened for a good reason.. On top of that, my husband would also be happy because I don’t have to leave him alone at home anymore..
Dia je yang pi naik kapal and tinggal saye… but at least I have my family around / near by.

So, kite tunggu dan lihat saje…

3 Girls, 3 Stories, 3 Deaths...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...

Assalamualaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh..





Lately, I have been encountered quite a number of the death of my patients.. some were the expected cases, but some were not.. Being a doctor who is working in a tertiary center like my hospital, patient passed away is common.. quite common until sometimes I don't feel anything about it... it should be a reminder to us that our death is also approaching, by time.. but I regret, because I rarely felt that way anymore.. sad, huh?!

Back to the topic... Once, I have three Down's syndrome girls... all three were super duper cute.. but sadly, being abnormal, there were a lot of underlying disease.. at least to three of them... what makes me want to tell story about them was they had a great mother.. a loving, patience and hopeful mothers.. but, knowing them, I know that they were not ready to lose their children in such a young age.. Let me call them Angel 1, Angel 2 and Angel 3...

Angel 1
She is lovely.. a 2-year-old girl, who had Leukemia (blood cancer). Has been started on chemotherapy and responded quite well. However, on and off still requiring admission due to fever and low blood components (platelet and hemoglobin).. towards the end of her life, she was admitted to my ward for fever and low platelet.. one day, when I was on-call, she vomited and coughed out blood.. I mean A LOT OF BLOOD.. with clots and non-stop bleeding from mouth and nose.. I was freaking panic, but I managed to hide it.. then after some resuscitation, the bleeding stopped.
The "peristiwa berdarah" happened twice, both during my on-call time, both around 2am.. scary, isn't it? then, she was transferred to PPUM for next chemotherapy.. I was the one who accompanied her there.. an ambulance ride was not as pleasant as i thought, though.. worrying that the event would happen again, I dare not close my eyes throughout the 3 hours journey.. Alhamdulillah, she was okay..
I heard that she was discharged home from PPUM after 2 weeks there, meaning that she was okay.. Until one day, one of my patient's mum told me, Angel 1 passed away because of non-stop bleeding at home.. similar episode and almost around the same time, 2am.... her parents did not have transport, thus they needed to call the ambulance from the nearest health clinic.. unfortunately this time, she didn't make it.. she succumbed upon arrival to the clinic.. I was shocked to hear the news, because it was unexpected.. May her soul rest in peace, and may Allah bless her mother for being such a wonderful mum and being so co-operative with us...

Angel 2
Angel 2 was one of a worst-case scenario.. pity her, she had a heart problem which also deteriorating her lung function.. she was referred to our National Heart Center, but true enough, her condition was so bad and nothing can be done.. not even operation.. it was conservative treatment, actually, whereby no active management could be done to fix her problem.. Angel 2 was admitted to our ward quite a number of time.. all were due to deteriorating heart condition whereby she would suddenly turned blue even on minimal exertion.. As far as I could remember, within the last 5 months, she has been admitted for 3 times..
Her last admission was last month, due to same presentation... but this time, she did not recover as fast as before.. usually, she would be okay after 2nd to 3rd day of admission.. but this time, she had fever and remain weak and poor oral intake even after the 4th day, in fact, her condition worsen.. I could sense that this time, she would not be able to discharge "well".. And I was right... She passed away during my on-call time.. I witnessed her last breath.. She was gasping but I couldn't do anything.. Her mother was crying beside her... Never let her hand go... I know that her mother understood the condition but she is her daughter.. Of course, tears shed non-stop.. I was sad.. I felt helpless, thus I decided to walk out.. Just few minutes after that, she stop breathing.. her heart stop beating.. no movement anymore.. She returned to Allah SWT at 1010am, 18th April 2010... Mother was calm, and I conveyed my condolence to her.. She hugged me, thanking me for all the care and treatment that we provided to her while she was still alive... I was stunned.. I don't think that I deserve the gratitude...

Angel 3
This girl was cute! She was 15 months old.. I have known her since she was small... She stayed in SCN (neonate ward) quite some time, when I was doing my housemanship still.. She had Leukemia as well, same as Angel 1.. we noticed that her blood components were always on the lower side, thus we did some work-up.. and yes, it was confirmed Leukemia.. both parents were denial during the earlier phase.. we had to convince them quite few times, sort of to persuade them to get a proper treatment in KL.. at last, they agreed and we then sent her to the centre... she responded quite well... her blood readings were most of the time were okay.. As far as I remember, after she started her chemotherapy, she was admitted only once to our ward due to low platelet.. And as already expected, staying in ward invited some nasty bugs to infect her.. she had febrile neutropenia.. but responded to antibiotics quite well... then she was discharged home and able to go for her next scheduled chemotherapy in HKL...
Last Thursday, her mother came to the ward.. I bumped into her and say "Hi".. suddenly, she hugged me.. she cried on my shoulder.. I asked her, "where is she?".. And this poor mother said "dia dah takde... dia pergi dalam tido.." Again.. my heart stopped for few seconds.. I was shocked.. Angel 3 was a very good example of successful treatment of Leukemia, plus, she was very lucky to have such a co-operative parents.. Mum said, she was discharged from HKL the week before... Very well and all blood components were good.. no fever, active at home.. cheeky and cute as she was.. Nothing was unusual the day before her death.. Until that Tuesday, mother woke up and saw her little Angel 3 already gone.. She sleep and sleep and sleep and never wake up anymore... It was hard for the mother to accept at first, but she was hanging in there.. So do I.. but Allah loves her more.. And the mother thanked me again, since I was the most frequent doctor that she met, since I was in-charge of the Daycare ward.. This time, I accept her gratitude, knowing that I have done my best for her daughter.. The last thing that her mother whispered to me was "Takpelah, doktor.. dia tunggu saya kat syurga, kan?" with tears rolling down... Owh... I had liver-ache... My cute little Angel 3, I wish I can meet you in Jannah.. please don't forget me...

So... 3 stories of 3 special girls.. Their presence has bring a lot of memories to their mothers.. and to me too...
Are we ready for our own time?
The time when HE call us to meet HIM?

Astaghfirullaahal'azim....

Special Edition : First Anniversary

Assalamualaykum....




It has been a year.. Alhamdulillah.. I have been married to a great man, the love of my life, Encik SURIA KENCANA BIN AMIRRUDIN (bukan nama syarikat ye..)..
It was a great year, awkward initially but meaningful in every moment.. every seconds were priceless, even though we were just sit side-by-side without any words spoken.. I realize some changes in my life after I got married... but truly, all were a good one..

The relationship between me and my father were markedly improved. So also between my parents and parents-in-law. I had a great time with my husband's big family.. Not to mention, all the weddings, holidays, hari raya, makan2... Such a great memories..

A lot of frens, aunts and uncles, cousins would ask, "dah ade isi ke belum?" well... at first, I felt a little bit sad, since a lot of friends had been having child earlier than me.. sedih okay, sampai nangis2.. But my husband is so understanding.. he would console and comfort me, saying that it's okay if we don't have baby yet.. as long as we have each other.. and now, i don't feel sad anymore.. we will keep on trying.. Maybe we are not ready yet (since our work were so hair-wire) and Allah knows far better than us.. Insya-Allah, in the future...

Marriage taught me the meaning of accepting and giving.. I used to be a "high-expectation" type of girl.. I would want my husband to be perfect in everything (last time le..). But after the solemnization, I knew that nothing was more precious than accepting my husband as what he is, and giving my best for him... And i know he feels the same way too.. But after all, my husband is the most perfect person for me.. He is my other half.. I found myself in him.. He completes me.. And that is more than enough for me..

To my dearest husband, thanks for being there for me..
Thanks for your shoulder when I need to wet it with my tears..
Thanks for your arm when i need a pillow to sleep at night..
Thanks for your hands when i need someone to hold me crossing the road..
Thanks for your stomach when i couldn't finish up the food (haha..)
Thanks for your wallet when i need a new clothes in Chantek Wangi..
Thanks for everything..
Thanks for being you...

I love you more than you know..
I really do..

p/s : celebrating our anniversary alone.. hmmm... kena qadak ni..

Cuti-Cuti Terengganu..

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...

Assalamualaykum warahmatullah..

Fuuuuhhh... sungguh sungguh lama tak update blog.. wah wah wah.. Mr. Sunshine pon dah berapa kali tanye "bile nak update blog, yang?".. jawapan standard saye.. "malas!" hehehhe.. anyway, kali ni ade cerita so boleh le update..

Actually, saye agak frustrated and penat kebelakangan nih.. Kerja everyday including weekend, since every weekend saye on-call except last weekend.. so memang penat.. then, saye mintak cuti after chinese new year sebab dah plan ngan family sebelah husband to go for holiday to Padang, Indonesia.. dah plan lama dah.. alih-alih last minute, my bosses tak bagi pergi.. alasan yang saye dapat tahu adalah, masa tak sesuai sebab after CNY.. hmmm... kecewa.. so what? bukannye saye mintak masa CNY.. in fact, mase aidilfitri pon saye cuti one day before raya until second day of raya.. third day raye saye dah kena kerja and on-call lagi.. did i make any noise?? NO.. hmm.. saye still rase tak adil and in the other hand, rase kesian ngan husband saye.. he had been planning for long to go for a holiday together after tiring work-days.. alih2 tak boleh pergi.. terpaksa le pujuk dia balik dgn ajak dia pi cuti2 kat terengganu..

Anyway, we went off to KT on Friday morning.. arrived KT around 2.30pm, we visited my hubby's old friends.. macam jejak kasih le pulak.. then, checked in at Sutra Beach Resort.. sangat sangat cantik, okay.. tempat tu betul2 tepi pantai tapi ombak kuat le, so memang takleh mandi laut.. But seronok jugak, sebab dapat spend time ngan Mr. Sunshine..
Next day, pergi Pasar Payang and bought some clothes for ourselves and for Mawaddah and Danial. Then, pergi ke Taman Tamadun Islam yang ade Masjid Kristal.. menarik tempat tu.. visited Taman Monumen.. Kat situ ade 21 masjid and bangunan yang cantik and terkenal kat dunia. diorang buat macam replika bangunan yang sebijik macam the real one, just smaller... Bagus untuk bawak anak2 atau anak-anak murid buat lawatan.. Then, malam tu pulak pegi rumah kawan hubby yang baru je walimah on that day.. ingatkan the next day tapi lupa pulak Tganu kerja on Sunday.. huhuhu.. Then, Sunday morning dah siap2 nak balik Kuantan balik... next day kena on-call balik.. urgh..
So, itu lah cerita cuti-cuti Terengganu.. instead of going to Padang, we went to Terengganu and manage to visit Tajmahal, As-Sakhrah, Masjidilharam, Masjid Nabawi and a lot of other interesting places.. Thanks to Mr. Sunshine for spending your precious time with me...

So, enjoy the photos...

New Syndrome ???

Assalamualaykum..



I was browsing through other medical personnel blogs, until i found this hilarious yet true article by him.. hahahhaa... Funny!! It's from Darren Magic's blog.. Enjoy reading, u all...

I remember during my med student time, my friend Steve and I was talking about can "no money" be considered an "illness". We went on elaborating it and found it kinda interesting. Imagine in the future medical textbook you see someting like this:

Chap XX: Hypo-money-ism

Defined as deficiency of money, a highly essential element in life.

Prevalance is believed to be high and the course of disease is fairly unpredictable.

Etiology and Pathophysiology
The etiology is numerous and could be multifactorial, but reduced input or increased output is usually the cause.

Signs and Symptoms
Increased level of anxiety, intermittent restlessness, transient drop in self-esteem, disturbances in sleep/appetite. The more severe one can be anhedonia (loss of interest), impaired psychosocial functioning and bouts of major depressive episodes.

Subtypes
1. Acute exacerbation of the illness
- Commonly seen in patients already with chronic underlying hypo-money-ism. Usually a sudden social event is the precipitating factor.

2. A-money-mic Crisis
- The most dangerous form of the illness, when the level of money drops to nil or even negative. Urgent treatment is necessary to prevent long-term complications.

Management
Rx is straightforward. Intra-wallet replacement of the element will result in rapid resolution of the symptoms and prompt recovery is expected. The outcome is generally well with usually no residual symptoms, and even the severe depression can be reversed with adequate treatment. No cases of overdose being reported. Studies have shown that some patients even will have certain degrees of amnesia of the previous suffering.

Prognosis
Recurrence is likely, and some patients will go into "frequent relapse", which can be difficult to treat. No effective preventive method reported. Patient education can play a role but its efficacy remains controversial.

An Opportunity To Share..

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...

Assalamualaykum warahmatullah..




Alhamdulillah, still given the chance by The Al-Mighty to live and appreciate the precious moment being a Muslim.. Yesterday was a hectic day, settling some matters involving my "hijacked" account.. Huhuhu.. yup, my account has been hijacked by somebody.. a total amount of one-month salary and on-call claim has been transferred to another 3rd party via online banking, without my knowledge. I only realized it when I got an sms mentioning that a successful transaction of RM 4xxx.00 from my account.. Police report made, as well as report to the respective bank.. Just a reminder, do not open or log in to your online banking account via email link.. in a simple word, don't trust any email from the "so-called" bank.. Because bank will never send any email to you if there is any problem with your saving account. They will call you straight away. Anyway, this is a lesson for me so that i'll be careful in the future.. As what I used to say once, "everything happens for a good reason." (huhuhu.. dalam pening kepala and pedih mata, sempat lagi pi bank n balai polis tu..)

And now, I am more calm.. got the chance to update my blog.. Hehehe.. my husband dah pesan semalam, "kalau ade masa, update le blog.. rindu nak baca.." padahal, almost everything I shared with him.. well, except some things that I think is not important to share.. But Suria Kencana memang busybody bile melibatkan saye.. hahahhaa! kalo boleh, rasenye dia nak pasang CCTV and recorder dalam otak saye, so that he knows what is in my mind.. That's my husband.. :) .. And I appreciate that very much..

What did I read today? Hmmm.. I read about Edward Syndrome.. Ape tuh??? Hmm... tukar bahasa pulak.. Sama macam Down's syndrome, Edward syndrome adalah jumlah chromosome yang tidak normal pada seseorang. kalau dalam Down's syndrome, jumlah chromosome pada set ke-21 terlebih (normally, setiap set akan ade 2 chromosome) menjadi 3 chromosome. Pada Edward syndrome pula, set ke-18 terlebih satu chromosome. Satu lagi syndrome adalah Patau syndrome, yang mana set ke-13 tak normal. What is the significant? The child with these syndromes are not normal. Kalau Down syndrome, tak seteruk mana sebab mereka boleh lagi hidup sampai dewasa, cuma terdapat beberapa kekurangan dan masalah yang bakal dihadapi. Contohnya, IQ dan mental mereka lebih rendah daripada orang yang normal, masalah jantung, masalah paru-paru, masalah salur pemakanan.. Kalau dalam Patau syndrome pulak, selalunye memang incompatible with life.. means, mereka selalunya tak hidup sebaik sahaja dilahirkan.. and Edward syndrome is in between of these 2 syndromes, I would say.. usually, they won't be able to survive after 1 year old, because of multiple congenital problems.. I have been given the opportunity to manage and handle few cases of Edward syndrome, being a doctor in Neonate Unit. The most shocking part is when you see the baby and you know she/he is not normal from the first glance. Sebab apa, those Edward's babies, they have some characteristics that shen u look at them, it is highly suspicious of the syndrome.. contoh : jari tangan mereka akan overlap with each other. The next thing u have to do is to confirm the diagnosis by scoring the physical appearance and fits it into the diagnosis (so that u won't misdiagnose). But the most challenging and toughest part is... to tell the parents that their baby is not normal and won't be able to survive long.. URGHHH.. I hate this part, especially when the parents dah lama menunggu2 kehadiran baby ni. (contohnya macam kahwin dah lama bertahun-tahun tapi baru dapat baby). The counselling and explanation must be very detail and full of sympathy since the withdrawal of treatment and care need to be understood by them. And usually, when I am the one who need to counsel them regarding this, it would be a sleepless night for me..

So far, the longest surviving baby of Edward syndrome that I have been encounter is a 3 months old baby girl. I remember explaining to the father that the baby is not normal. But the baby able to live up to 3 months. Subhanallah.. But today, I read in this blog : http://cutcahya.wordpress.com/
the life of Cut Cahya and family, whereby Cut Cahya is a two and a half year old Edward's syndrome girl.. Amazing and full of sacrifice.. both parents are strong-willing and so also Cahya..

This blog of Cahya's life and survival really enlighten me on how Allah tests His servants in many ways.. And we should be grateful and patient when we are choosen by Him to be tested.. It shows that we are not forgotten by HIM and thus, we should not forget HIM in no matter what we do....

Wallahu a'lam....

p/s : boring jugak kalo MC lama ni...

Red Eyes... Red Eyes..

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim..


I woke up this morning, started to feel itchy over both my eyes.. Hmm... slightly swollen, but that was because i shed tears before i went to sleep last night.. Dalam hati dah terlintas "alamak.. janganlah conjunctivitis.." because if i do get one, it gonna be a very bad one.. sujud pon rase berat otak.. macam nak terkeluar biji mata.. tengok kat cermin, tak merah.. so takpelah, boleh pi kerja and do the scheduled on-call today.. gatal siket2 but i don't dare to scratch or wipe, sebab takut lagi teruk.. just put on some optrex and went off to work..

Arrived to the ward, started to feel throbbing pain and teary eyes.. pi toilet jap.. ARGGHHHH!!! DAH MERAH.... huhuhu... met my Specialist and tell her about my new prob. Went off to Casualty Department and consulted my fren there.. She said, it is obviously Viral Conjunctivitis.. Baru nak jadi.. Got my 5-days MC then went off home.. Kat rumah, start demam.. telan Panadol dua biji dah tadi..

Called my husband, and he said "wah!! that's a good news!" .. hmmm... he's coming back today.. But.. i'm a little bit frustrated though.. first, baru je nak buat rekod bersih tak pernah amik MC since start kerja.. so kire ni first time le.. second, kesian my colleague kena ganti on-call.. got 2 on-call this week.. today and saturday.. that means, terlepas 2 kali le.. isk... isk.. isk... third, mata nih rase berdenyut2...

But the good thing is, boleh le rest kejap from work.. Although in a painful way.. Next week, I have to see my boss and submit my transfer form.. That's my plan for next week.. Bagi ke tak, belakang kira..

..... Nak tido .....

The Truth Is....

The truth is....
I started to feel bored..
Bored with the over-work work...
Bored when I have to do what I don't want to do...
Bored when most of my time was spent to please others...
Bored with all the unfinished work...

The truth is....
I miss my privacy..
I miss my rest-day..
I miss spending my precious time with my family...
I miss my passion of doing things that i like..
I miss my basketball shoes..
I miss my leisure walking during the evening at tasik..

And the truth is...
I am tired pretending to be strong..
I am tired crying alone in my room..
I am tired physically, mentally and perhaps spiritually...

What keep my going are....
HIS rewards to those whom work hard for the sake of HIS blessing..
And the priceless words and motivation from my husband...

BUT....
I am not weak..
I am not a loser..
I am just.. TIRED...

p/s : huhuhuhu.. ini adalah luahan rasa ketika jiwa kacau..

What's Going On...? H1N1 !!!

Assalamualaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh..

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim..


Okay, to begin with, I shall apologize to all readers (if any) for a very long silence.. But hey, a human needs some space and a break to come out with a new idea, right?! Hehehe.. alasan.. alasan..

Hmm... mari berbahasa Malaysia.. supaya ape yang saye nak sampaikan kali ni sepenuhnya difahami oleh mereka yang bukan dari latar belakang perubatan.. dengan rase penuh rendah diri dan menyedari bahawa saye ada tanggungjawab sosial terhadap masyarakat sebagai seorang pengamal perubatan, kali ni saye akan ceritakan serba sedikit tentang H1N1 atau swine flu atau selesema babi..

Kalau kite ikuti kes-kes kematian H1N1 di Malaysia sekarang, 2-3 minggu kebelakangan ni, kebanyakan kematian adalah dari kalangan kanak-kanak (paediatrics group). Di Kuantan sahaja, 2 org kanak-kanak meninggal kerana virus ni.. apa yang perlu diberi perhatian sekarang, pesakit H1N1 sekarang tidak lagi datang dengan simptom seperti batuk, selesema dan demam sahaja.. salah seorang pesakit tersebut, datang dengan lemah badan dan sawan.. keadaan menjadi semakin teruk walaupun telah dirawat secara sepatutnya, sehinggalah seoarng pakar perunding mengarahkan supaya sampel darah dan throat-swab diambil untuk ujian H1N1, dan keputusannya POSITIF.. malangnya, pesakit tu dah terlalu teruk dan tak dapat diselamatkan.. hmmm... something to ponder..

kenapa tetiba je wabak ni tersebar dengan cepatnya??? Well, sebahagiannya adalah salah kite sendiri.. secara am, virus H1N1 ini memang sangat senang berjangkit (infectious) tapi tidaklah sebahaya sehingga membawa maut (virulent) pada awalnya.. (aduhai.. susahnye nak translate english to BM).. kalau diikutkan, first case dalam Malaysia adalah import case, yang mane pesakit baru pulang dari oversea.. first case dalam Pahang juga adalah import case (tourist from Australia, kalo tak salah, yang cuti-cuti Malaysia kat Tioman).. so, sebenarnya virus ni dah merebak even pada orang2 yang takde simptom di luar sana.. tapi, bile terkena pada kanak-kanak yang sememangnya sistem pertahanan badan lebih lemah berbanding orang dewasa, keadaan akan menjadi lebih teruk... inilah yang menyebabkan kematian..

Orang akan kate, ubat kan ade.. Tamiflu.. tapi sebenarnye, berita terkini dan kajian yang terbaharu mengatakan Tamiflu tidak lagi seratus peratus effective, kerana virus ini terlalu cepat bermutasi dan 40-50% resistant pada Tamiflu (in simpler word, tak jalan dah ubat tu....).. Then, orang akan bercakap tentang vaccine yang dengar2 akan muncul dalam hujung tahun ni.. Huhuhuhuh.. secara sadisnye, negara kite Malaysia akan dapat vaccine tu agak lewat, kerana of course negara2 maju akan conquer dulu.. Lagipun, vaccine tu agak mahal dan keberkesanan masih diragui, memandangkan ia adalah vaccine/ubat baru.. sama la macam viagra dulu.. orang kate ubat tu sangat2 hebat dan berkesan, tapi bile terlalu digunakan secara berleluasa dan tak banyak kajian dibuat mengenai keberkesanan dan side effect ubat tu, ade jugak kes-kes kematian disebabkan viagra.. Tapi jgn risau, sebab vaccine H1N1 ni dengarnye agak berkesan, cuma bile nak sampai ke Malaysia?? Wallahua'lam.. khabarnye vaccine tu akan ready by October (before winter sebab negara2 musim sejuk ni takut le sbb virus ni akan lebih teruk kesannya dalam musim sejuk) but akan ade dalam pasaran dunia by December.. kalo sampai ke Malaysia pon, all the VIPs akan dapat keistimewaan dulu.. Hmm.. again, discrimination.. hehehhee... ape2 je lah..

Ape yang kite boleh buat.. Banyak!!

1. Elakkan berada di tempat2 yang sesak dan ramai orang (over-crowding)
- penting ni, sebab virus akan lagi senang berjangkit dalam keadaan sesak... So, buat masa ni, takyah le pi shopping2 kat SOGO ke, Jalan TAR ke.. tapi sure pergi jugak kan.. raye kan tak lama dah.. hmmm... kalo ikutkan, hukum islam pon menekankan prevention especially bile berkaitan dengan kesihatan.. rasenye, tak berdosa kalau tahun ni punye raye, kite pakai baju2 yang dah ade.. lagi bagus dari expose diri dan keluarga pada virus bahaya ni.. tapi kalo nak pegi jugak, tak yah le bawak anak2 kecik, sebab diorang akan lagi senang nak dapat virus tu..

2. Pakai mask..
- well, ini salah satu cara le.. cuma, jenis mask yang sesuai adalah yang type N95.. yang bulat serkup hidung n mulut tuh.. especially pada yang kerja kat hospital..

3. Jangan panik..
- kebelakangan ni, ramai yang datang ke hospital untuk dimasukkan ke wad sebab selesema, batuk dan demam.. penuh le jugak bahagian kecemasan sampaikan 3 jam tunggu baru dapat rawatan.. tu pon doktor tak amik ujian darah atau throat-swab untuk H1N1.. jangan salahkan hospital or doctors, sebab kementerian kesihatan mengarahkan kami hanya mengambil ujian darah kepada patient yang teruk dan ada masalah pernafasan.. pastu, marah doktor lagi sebab tak admit ke ward.. isk, ingat ward ni selamat ke? kami ade lagi macam-macam jenis virus, bakteria dan kuman2 pelik dalam ward yang lebih bahaya dari H1N1.. so, kalau doktor tak admit ke ward, kuarantin diri anda atau anak-anak kat rumah, sampai sihat... jangan panik dan nak salahkan doktor.. kami ade sebab yang kukuh untuk berbuat demikian.. malah, adalah lebih selamat kuarantin di rumah, kerana lebih bersih.. tapi kalau keadaan makin teruk atau tak baik2 jugak lebih dari 3 hari, come back to hospital..

4. Doa dan bertaubat banyak-banyak..
- kalo difikirkan dengan penuh keinsafan dan tawadhuk, mungkin ini adalah satu musibah dan amaran dari Allah, tentang kemungkaran yang berleluasa sekarang.. Adakah kite pernah terfikir, apa yang Allah nak sampaikan melalui musibah ni..? Bak kata nabil... Lu pikirlah sendiri.. ape tindakan kite? tepuk dada, tanye iman... Bukan aiman, sebab Aiman tak kisah...

Okaylah.. siket je yang saye boleh share, sebab dah pening otak nak convert english ke bahasa malaysia.. susah weh... Maaf kalau ade salah bahasa atau cacat-cela dalam entry kali ni.. hanyalah sedikit perkongsian dari saye yang penuh kelemahan dan hanya sedikit kelebihan yang Allah berikan pada saye..

Last but not least, jaga diri anda dan keluarga.. dalam masa yang sama, jaga iman dan banyak2 le ingat pada Allah, pada mati.. Sesungguhnya, orang yang paling bijak adalah orang yang paling banyak mengingati mati... Wallahu a'lam...

p/s : Thank you, Allah, for the idea and every breath that You gave to me..
To my beloved husband, sila cepat balik... hehehe...

Untitled... Speechless.. Blank!

Assalamualaykum...

Okay.. sebelum ape-ape, saye kena admit yang saye tak update dah lama.. Reasons.. 1.No idea.. 2.Malas... 3.Technical Problem... Hehehe.. whatever it is, this entry is to fulfill my husband's request.. Well, seems you are not around, honey.. :)

First, my life.. Most of my frens akan tanye, "macam mane hidup lepas kawen?". My answer would be... BEST! hehehe.. The detail of it, u have to ask those yang dah kawen.. But the most important of it is.. dapat sempurnakan sebahagian dari Islam.. Me and my husband, we have gone through a lot of challenges.. And alhamdulillah, we manage to face it, with the great help from The Al-Mighty...

Second, work.. Alhamdulillah, able to cope with my works quite okay nowadays.. Dealing with babies, of course it is much much more better than dealing with adult.. Babies won't swear or say vulgar words to us.. they just cry.. The most important is.. they are super duper cute! I enjoy my work so far.. Although at the beginning, I didn't think I can handle it.. But really... I like what I'm doing..

Third, my house.. I moved to a new house in Indera Mahkota 2.. Such a lovely house, just like the owner.. Rent it, fully furnished.. A little bit far from the previous house to the hospital but it doesn't matter.. My husband and I happy with it.. That's the most important, rite?

Enough for now.. Anyway, Ramadhan is just around the corner.. Looking forward very much to enjoy the sweetness of Ramadhan, together with someone whom I love.. Previous years since I graduate from IIUM, breaking fast and sahur was by myself.. alone and only me alone.. well, sometimes ngan family and nurses when I was on-call.. Anyway, this year would be different.. May Allah bless all of us... Ameen..

p/s: Seems like this year, my Eid celebration would be in two places... Huhuhu...

10052009 - MBSA, Shah Alam...

09052009 - INSPEN Bangi

So malas to update the blog.. so just letak few photos je la ek..

My Wedding...

Just nak letak some photos je..

Ni gambar2 nikah.. on Friday, 1st May 2009 bersamaan dengan 6 Jamadil-awwal 1430 hijrah..

kalo nak tgk gambar2 hantaran saye, click this :
http://syirazlilcottage.fotopages.com/

Alhamdulillah...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...

Assalamualaykum wbt..

Saye minta maaf sebab dah terlalu lama tak update.. banyak faktor2 ketidak-update-an blog nih.. kerja, wedding, on-call, kerja lagi... uhuhuhu.. anyway, yang penting sekali, saye dah kawen.. eheheheh!! Thanks for all frens yang datang mase majlis nikah n walimah saye.. sangat2 terharu bile tengok my frens datang segerombolan, walaupon dah lepas majlis bersanding pon.. uhuhuhu.. yang penting, dapat jumpa diorang..
Thousand thanks jugak pada Didi&Hawa and family, Shakirah n family, Ucu and fiancee.. kawan2 lama yang tak sempat saye jumpa hari tuh.. kehadiran anda semua sangat bermakna pada saye...

Sempat saye pergi honeymoon ke Pulau Perhentian.. the moment was so great.. priceless experience and memories with my beloved husband.. I love you..

And now, dah kembali ke Kuantan.. attending Induction Course for 2 weeks (from 14th to 28th May).. my sunshine went for works (sailing) to Singapore for 2 weeks.. Insya-Allah, we'll see each other another 2 weeks ye..

Photos mase nikah n wedding ceremonies tak banyak sebab kami mintak professional photographers amik gambar.. ade few je yang dalam personal cam. So nanti bile dah siap, i'll upload the rest okay?

Jemput Datang Semua...

click on image for larger view

Assalamualaykum...

Jemput datang semua ye...
Kalo nak kad, sile email/sms/pm address..
Doakan semoga semua berjalan lancar ek..

Atas Permintaan Ramai..

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...

Assalamualaykum warahmatullah..

Nampaknye, ramai yang mintak saye cerita pasal Kuantan ye.. hehehhe..
Kuantan masih lagi macam dulu.. Life in Kuantan is not as busy as KL.. this is the reason why I agreed to work in Kuantan before, sebab unlikely le nak jam, even kalo kuar time peak hours pon...
What's new? East Coast Mall, of course.. it's a smaller version of Alamanda Putrajaya, I would say.. not bad.. Banyak jugak kedai2 yang menarik..

Pasal hospital pulak, right now I'm in Paeds.. Herm.. altho memula takut nak masuk Paeds bcoz I heard all the bad remarks about the postings.. But hey.. Paeds is not that bad.. workload is tolerable, nurses are quite nice (yang penting, be humble with them..).. Specialists pon takde la teruk.. Okayla, maybe all my colleagues kate I am Dr. S*l*a's favourite tapi bukan saye mintak pon nak jadi his fav.. Anyway, he treats me equally as others, cuma certain opportunities yang HO lain tak dapat, tapi dia bagi saye buat.. Hmmm... but believe me, saye tak amik kesempatan ye.. bila saye buat silap, dia tetap tegur sama macam org lain.. so, pedulik le ape org lain cakap.. yang penting, saye tak pernah tuang kerja.. and advantage working here is that, familiar place and familiar people.. specialists ramai yg lecturer UIA so they easily recognize us..

Sekarang nih, saye dah ade housemate.. My colleague from HUKM whom has been very nice to me.. huhuhu.. bayangkan le, kalo saye on-call, dia akan belikan makanan untuk saye n bawak ke ward.. mane la nak dapat housemate camtu (kecuali le soul-mate, kan Mr. Sunshine?) di zaman2 ini.. hehehe.. Housing area is great, although kitorang tak sempat nak bermesra sgt dgn jiran2.. ye lah, weekend pon kerja.. but at least, we know what is happening to our neighbourhood... Kawan2, (Asma', Aqien, Naja, Shade, Asek, Fadh and all others...) jemput le dtg ke Kuantan, buat gathering.. boleh lepak kat rumah saye.. we have a lot of space.. hehehe.. macam kat rumah Shade jugak le.. boleh pi jalan2 kat Cherating, mandi-manda kat air terjun.. huhuhu..

Isk.. ape lagi yang korang nak tahu ek?! Hehehe.. rasenye cukup la dulu ni ek.. Tak lama lagi saye kena tukar, tak tau dapat klinik kesihatan ke, atau district hospital.. harap2 KK le, sebab saye tanak on-call dah... I'll let u all know, where is my next workplace later ya..

Till then, take care all...

p/s : Jelesnya saye dgn Wazir... Dia dapat pi Palestine.. Cepat-cepat, jom kite same2 bantu diorang dgn ape yang kite ade.. Oh yes, I'm 27 already.. duh...

Maafkan Saya...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...

Assalamualaykum warahmatullah..

Herm.. Saye minta maaf sebab lama dah tak update.. Tiada alasan lain yang lebih sesuai selain daripada malas.. hehehe.. Takpelah, let us catch up with few things that had happened in my life..

1. Work
Paediatrics is not that bad.. memang penat and banyak kerja tapi still tolerable.. (Mr. Sunshine sure faham dgn perangai saye yg workaholic nih..)especially bile tgk muka all the kids nih... terubat balik.. comel sangat! hehehe.. tapi bile saye kena cucuk diorang, no mercy ye... hehehhe.. sebab as a doctor, kite nak make sure diorang sihat and kami sebagai perawat tak tertinggal anything yang boleh membuatkan kami salah diagnose.. that is why, cucuk tetap cucuk.. unless parents dia tak bagi, then we can't force..

2. Personal Life
Alhamdulillah, I'm counting days.. insya-Allah, saye jemput semua yang membaca blog saye nih untuk datang ke majlis saye nanti pada 9hb May 2009, di Dewan INSPEN, Bangi.. tolong bagi alamat ye kalo nak kad.. or just leave a message..

Erm... bila dah lepas satu perkara yang besar, yang lain semua menjadi remeh dan kecik je.. so, terlepas segala beban masalah saye selama ni.. :)

Dah le dulu.. Untuk warm up ni, kena siket2 je.. nama pon warm up.. hehehe... Take care all...

p/s : Doakan saye... Doakan saudara kite dia Palestine..

New Title... Auntie??

Tido ternganga.. macam Papa dia.. hahahha

asyik tido je budak Danial nih.. tanak bukak mata langsung..

Tengok tu.. tido lagi.. hehhee..

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...

Assalamualaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh..

Life has been great for me lately.. :).. Alhamdulillah... Few good things happened and I feel grateful for being able to enjoy blessful life so far..

- New family member -
My brother just got a baby boy on 16th October.. This budak was born at about 10.10pm.. I would say that my sis-in-law has gone through quite an easy process of delivery.. Masuk labour room at about 7pm, time tuh cervix opened 5 cm.. then 3 hours later, budak nih kuar.. hahahha.. being 2.93 kg, memang tak susah mane la nak kuar, unlike some mothers who had to struggle for this critical process.. Alhamdulillah.. Danial Harith Bin Hazim, your presence has been the greatest moment for all of us..
So, panggilan baru dalam family..
- Abah = Tok Abah
- Ummi = Tok Ummi (macam tua sangat le pulak..)
- Saye yg best nih = Cik Ina..
hahahah... tak sabar nak tunggu budak nih besar..

- Patient oh Patient -
Sorang makcik datang ke hospital mase saye on-call.. pukul 3am, nurse panggil and bagitahu makcik nih baru masuk.. so saye kena pergi interview and buat pape yang patut before dia masuk ward..
She has history of long-standing diabetes mellitus, on Insulin injection (showing that her illness could not longer be controlled by taking pills).. She complained of right foot pain and having pus discharge from a wound in between her big toe and second toe.. she said, it was just about a week ago.. means, tak le lama mane.. but looking at her foot condition, I didn't think so it's a one week event.. very bad condition, okay.. nanah keluar even kalo saye picit sket je.. swollen foot with redness and warm skin, showing that she has a severe infection on that foot.. and to my surprise, ade lagi satu luka kat tapak kaki dia, bahagian belakang.. guess what I found there?? MAGGOTS @ ULAT (yang macam ulat buah tu).. I was so shocked.. bukan sebab geli.. tapi terkejut sebab makcik tu pon tahu ade maggot kat situ!! dia biar je.. katenye " dah buang siket smalam, tapi ade lagi le Doktor.. so makcik biar je la.." Adeh.. sakit dada saye.. ni kena buat ECG ni, takut2 kena heart attack pulak saye..
Saye tak puas hati, so saye korek cerita lagi.. rupe-rupenye luka tu dah lama.. 3 minggu punye luka, start kuar nanah 2 minggu lepas.. pi cuci kat klinik biasa, tak sembuh jugak.. pastu husband dah malas nak hantar pi klinik, so makcik nih just amik ubat cuci and buat sendiri kat rumah.. condition of the wound getting worst, then makcik nih mintak ngan husband supaya hantar pi hospital.. husband tak nak.. sebab katenye, kalo pi hospital, nanti kena potong kaki (sebab sedara dia ade yg kena potong kaki kerana kencing manis)... dah lepas jadi makin teruk sampai makcik ni tak tahan dah tengok maggots tuh kuar, makcik ni mintak ngan jiran dia hantar ke hospital.. so she ended up in my ward..
Patut tak saye marah?? memang saye dah marah pon.. tapi more of marah pada husband dia.. tanggungjawab suami untuk jaga isteri.. kalo tanak hantar isteri ke hospital semata-mata kerana takut kaki isteri kena potong, bertanggungjawab ke tu? lebih rela isteri sakit and menderita kat rumah, daripada hantar ke hospital?? Urgh.. saye tak paham lelaki yang macam ni..
Saye marah jugak kat makcik tu, sebab tak bertegas.. dia kate, dia takut derhaka pada suami.. Isk.. tak paham saye.. mungkin kena tukar siket syllabus dalam Kursus Pra-perkahwinan supaya jelaskan pada bakal2 isteri, dalam keadaan ape yang seorang isteri boleh menidakkan arahan @ kata2 suami..
But all in all, makcik tuh selamat le.. tak perlu potong kaki pun, just operate siket je untuk buang tisu2 mati + nanah + maggots tuh.. And, saye tak pernah nampak pon suami dia datang melawat.. Hmmm...

So, pengajaran dari 2 cerita di atas..
- I am getting older.. dah jadi Auntie pun.. Erk...
- Love yourself first, before loving others.. And to all husbands, jgn salah guna kuasa ye.. Suami sepatutnye melindungi dan menjaga isteri, bukan memudaratkan lagi..

Till then, thanks for reading this, people..

p/s : Ummi n Abah saye excited jadi grandpa n grandma.. Ummi jahit bengkung bunga2 lagi untuk Danial!! hehehe.. sedondon dengan bengkung Mama dia.. Comel!