Saturday, October 27, 2007

Tunggu Teduh Dulu...



Assalamualaykum

Rasanya, terlalu lama saye meninggalkan kecintaan saye yang satu ini.. membaca.. Dan Jumaat lepas, buku yang telah 2 tahun saye idamkan sudahpun berjaya saye miliki.. YESSS!!! Dan tanpa menunggu, terus saja buku itu saye belek dan baca.. Sekarang, novel yang berhalaman 678 mukasurat itu telah pun separuh saye baca...

Cerita tentang kehidupan dan cinta, cabaran dan kejayaan, pilihan dan dugaan... kesemuanya akhirnya berbalik pada ketentuan yang telah Dia tetapkan.. Itu kesimpulan yang dapat saye rumuskan setakat ini tentang kisah hidup Salsabila Fahim, watak utama novel ini.. Maaf ye, ini bukan kisah cinta picisan semata.. Saye tidak lagi gemar membaca novel cinta khayalan yang terlalu asyik membuai perasaan.. Tapi novel Tunggu Teduh Dulu karya Faisal Tehrani ini mampu membuka minda dan mencuit sedikit keinsafan dalam hati.. Walau ade serba sedikit kata-kata serong tentang Faisal Tehrani, tapi jangan risau, saye tidak terikut dengan fahaman beliau.. Saye hanya gemarkan corak penulisan beliau yang 'inspiring' dan 'educating'.. Tak sia-sia membaca novel nih..

Tentang kehidupan saye, cukuplah saye katakan yang saye lebih tenang berbanding dulu.. Saye yakin, setiap kejadian yang menimpa kita tentu ade hikmah di sebaliknya.. Kadang2, terpaksa mengisi masa terluang dengan kerja2 dan mem'busy'kan diri sendiri supaya tidak terlalu terkenang perkara lalu.. Alhamdulillah, agak berkesan.. Anyway, my life is not that bad actually.. Still ade perkara2 yang mencuit hati dan menggembirakan berlaku.. Masih ade ruang untuk tersenyum dan berasa bahagia.. hati saye belum 'mati', cuma terguris sedikit..

Tanggungjawab sebagai seorang doktor juga menuntut kesabaran yang tinggi.. Kalau ikutkan hati, nak je saye marah beberapa pesakit yang terlalu degil dan tak mahu mendengar nasihat.. Tapi tersedar yang tugas saye merawat mereka dan memastikan tanggungjawab saye tertunai.. selebihnya, mereka yang empunya diri lebih berhak.. dan paling utama, DIA yang di atas sana yang akan menentukan segalanya..

Terharu saye apabila terserempak dengan pesakit saye.. Pasangan India yang sangat romantik.. Si isteri sudah selamat melahirkan anak pertama dan sememangnya saye menjaga dia sepenuh hati saye kerana memikirkan di usia yang lanjut seperti dia, baru beroleh rezeki untuk mendapat cahaya mata setelah bertahun-tahun mencuba.. It was a very precious pregnancy for the couple, and of course for me.. Si suami pula ramah bercerita dengan saye ketika menunggu kelahiran bersama2 si isteri di dewan bersalin.. Bagaimana dia menjaga isterinya yang mengandung.. tidak dibenarkan isterinya yang berkerja itu membuat sebarang kerja rumah apabila pulang dari pejabat.. semuanya dia yang uruskan.. walaupun memasak, dia yang akan lakukan manakala isteri hanya menemankan di dapur.. Pendek kata, dia juga mengaku yang dia terlalu memanjakan isterinya ketika mengandung.. Takdir Tuhan, proses kelahiran tidak berjalan lancar.. poor progress, itu yang kami panggil.. sedari awal masuk ke dewan bersalin, bukaan pintu rahim tetap juga 3cm..

Pembedahan emergency Caeserean section terpaksa dilakukan.. saye nampak ade genang air mata di wajah si suami... di saat si isteri ditolak masuk ke bilik bedah, dia menggamit saye.. " Dr Hanin, isteri saye akan selamat ke? " Aduhh... ape harus saye katakan.. setiap pembedahan ade risikonya, tapi saye tak mahu dia terus risau.. ape yang boleh saye katakan adalah " She'll be fine.. insya Allah ".. dia merenung saye, memohon kepastian tapi hanya anggukan yang boleh saye berikan..

Alhamdulillah, si isteri selamat.. anak lelaki mereka juga selamat.. Dan pagi itu, ketika saye sedang 'panas' menahan marah kerana karenah seorang rakan setugas, pasangan ini menegur saye.. si ibu dan anak sudah dibenarkan pulang.. si suami bersuara gembira dan mengucapkan terima kasih.. " Terima kasih, Doktor, kerana selamatkan isteri dan anak saye.." Rasa marah terus padam.. datang pula rase terharu dan bangga.. syukur, Ilahi.. Kau memberikanku semangat dan dorongan di saat aku hilang punca.. Saye tersenyum panjang sampai ke petang..

Hmmm... perasaan yang pelik.. di saat saye diuji dengan cinta dunia, Dia siramkan semangat untuk saye terus berbakti.. kerana Dia-lah, saye akan terus tabah.. bukan kerana yang lain...

Bak kata Teh Sofia, sahabat karib Salsabila..
" kerja Tuhan, siapa yang tahu?"

Sunday, October 21, 2007

A New Episode In My Life..



Assalamualaykum..

A new episode in my life has begin...
And I hope it's the best decision for everyone..
Still adapting with the 'new' environment..
But I believe that everything would be okay later..
I know that everything would be okay..
The journey of life must go on...
No matter what happened..
And please Allah..
Let me be strong, facing all the tribulations..
For sometimes, I feel weak inside..
I know You won't leave me alone...
Like others did..

Saturday, October 06, 2007

Alone Again..



" Time to be alone again..
So, I'm hibernating..
Forgive me..."

Maaf...




Assalamualaykum...

Beberapa postings yg tak sesuai, telah saye hapuskan..
Too much controversial is not good for a da'ie..
Sorry kalau ade yang terasa..
Niat saye bukan nak menyindir atau membuat sesiapa terasa, cuma nak meluahkan apa yang dalam hati saye di dalam blog saye..
Anyway, seribu kemaafan...
Ramadhan dah nak berakhir...
Saye tak nak ia berakhir dengan seribu kesalahan terletak di bahu saye..


Kepada yang berkenaan, saye minta maaf..
Betul2 minta maaf..
Saye takkan menulis apa2 lagi yang berkaitan dengan itu..


p/s: pengajaran bagi saye, tak semua orang sukakan kite.. thanks to all commentors ye..

Saturday, August 11, 2007

HUKM Ho Reporting Duty... huhuhuh..


Assalamualaykum...

Alahmdulillah, saye masih ade kekuatan untuk update blog walaupon sepuluh hari yang lepas is my busiest days... frankly, saye kepenatan bekerja. mungkin dalam proses baru nak adapt ngan working environment in HUKM, thus making me a little bit shock.. huhuhu.. betul la sesetengah org cakap, sure nangis le kalo memula keja nih.. and I did... hehehe.. tapi sekali je ye, sebab dah penat sangat.. gratefully, ade yang sudi mendengar dan memujuk.. :)

HO-life is busy, regardless kat mane le kite keja.. in the first month, I would say the adaptation period is very important.. that's the moment when u have to organize urself with a lot of works.. yang bukan kerja kite pon (sebenarnye kerja MO atau registrar) akan jadik keja kite.. so be prepared.. anyway, i have confidence that everything would be okay after a month..

Kat HUKM, saye kena posting kat Obs and Gynae.. lagik le mencabar!! dengan macam2 karenah MOs and specialists, nak layan nurse yang macam2 perangai.. ade yang baik, alhamdulillah diorang faham le yang saye nih baru keja tak sampai 2 minggu.. tapi ade yang kerek, boleh cakap yang saye sepatutnye jadik competent macam org lain after a week of tagging (nih maksudnye kite ikut HO lain buat keja, to observe how they work..). tapi takpe, sebab bile dapat sambut baby and bile patient berterima kasih pada saye, terubat le sket penat tuh... tak hilang tapi sekurang2nye rase kite dihargai..

And lebih mengharukan, last Thursday pulak saye jumpa Dr. Samsul, my fav lecturer back in Kuantan, kat ward... to visit his sister-in-law, tak salah saye.. dia tegur saye sbb saye tak perasan, dok buat kerja.. then tak sempat entertain.. lepas tuh baru saye sms dia and apologize.. He sms-ed me back
" Takpe, yang penting jangan mudah give up. Jumpa u di post-grade nanti. banyak tawakal pada-Nya. kerja u mudah nanti.."
Terharu dengan pesanan nih.. hehehe.. oleh itu semangat saye pon naik le..

Herm... tak boleh panjang2 kot, banyak keja nak buat.. anyway, my convocation is on 26th August.. alhamdulillah, dh dapat pelepasan..

Doakan saye kuat, doakan saye tabah.. Terima kasih atas pengertian semua yang masih memahami diri saye..

p/s : rase2nye saye akan jadik lebih kurus.. kalo on call, sure tak sempat makan.. Mr.Sunshine, makan skali bagi pihak saye ye.. huhuhu..

Monday, July 30, 2007

Ready... Get Set... Go!



Assalamualaykum...

Today went to HUKM to survey the way to my new workplace... It took about 30mins to reach there from Putrajaya (minus the traffic jam).. and a friend of mine told me not to be late from house because that area is a potential area for traffic jam.. with a lot of educational institutions.. anyway, glad to know that the highway is quite familiar to me.. wah...

Last night, I met my lecturer back in IIUM.. Mr. Hafiz and wife.. they were in Alamanda, doing some shopping.. wahahaha! glad enough to know that he still remember me.. and he said HUKM is good place for housemanship... bersemangat sket nak keja..

Yesterday, went to a walimah in MBSA.. :-) very very happy and grateful to be around his family members and relatives yang sangat ramah, welcoming and warm... orang tuh jadik 'penyepit', kipas pengantin macam kipas sate jek... huhuhu! anyway, u look cool le.. hehehehe! insya-Allah, next year ek..

Jap lagi nak buat checklist to start working.. ape2 borang yang kena bawak and prepare the books and reading stuff that may be useful later.. huhuhu! lama sungguh cuti, 3 months... memang dah berkarat otak nih.. nasib baik still ingat the sequence utk sambut baby tuh camane.. isk... teruja nye nak kerja! anyway, my self-inking stamp pon dah siap.. mamak tukang buat rubber stamp tuh siap pesan suruh ingat muka dia supaya senang dia nak amik ubat... isk.. ingat saye nih tukang bagi ubat ke?

So, okaylah.. sekian terima kasih buat mase nih.. huhuhu..

Friday, July 27, 2007

At Last..





Assalamualaykum..

Akhirnye... dapat jugak update!! Isk.. susah betul la bile takde PC kat rumah nih... CPU ade ngan Abe lagi so terpaksa le pi CC.. herrrmmm.... Ade 3 cerita...

Cerita 1:
Bestnye pi Tioman!!! huhuhuhu... first time pi pulau, memang excited sangat2.. we stayed at Kampung Salang dan chalet pon not bad...and my favourite activity was snorkeling.. wahahaha.. macam2 bentuk ikan nih.. ade yang lonjong, yang muncung, yang macam bendera Pahang, yang macam telinga gajah.. and corals pon lawa2.. saye nampak menatang macam kerang dok nganga.. tapi takut le pulak, kalo2 dia ngap tangan saye...
Belanja pon okay...
naik feri dari Mersing-Tioman-Mersing = RM65..
chalet (aircond and boleh tido 4 org, toilet dalam) = RM75 per nite
snorkeling equipment = RM 12 per set (sehari sewa le)
makan2 = sehari boleh le RM20
laian-lain = ikut suke hati le nak belanja pape..
basically, with RM250, dah boleh enjoy tahap mentibang laut masak kicap le.. tak puas snorkeling thus i decided to go again next time.. ermm.. dengan org lain le pulak.. huhuhu... tgk matahari terbit, matahari terbenam and matahari depan mata.. :-)

Cerita 2:
Saye posting HO kat HUKM... at first macam tak redah jek sebab malas nak travel jauh2.. kan best kalo dapat Putrajaya jek.. tapi bile pikir baik2, advantage banyak le kalo kt HUKM banding dgn Putrajaya.... anyway, wish me luck ye...

Cerita 3:
A senior of mine, Allahyarham Dr. Fairus Hisyam succumbed in a motor-vehicle accident, near Gambang highway... He was an ex-IIUM doctor, saving lives in Orthopaedics Department in HTAA... and he left behind a pregnant wife (38wks POA) Dr. Maslina and a baby, almost 2 yrs old.. moral of the case : always be prepared for the call from Him.... innalillahi wainna ilaihi raji'uun..


p/s: the sweet, sour and bitter of life...

Thursday, July 19, 2007

I'm Back!!



Assalamualaykum..


Huhuhu.. at last dapat jugak blogging semula, after more than a week hibernating.. :) yup Mr Sunshine.. dah bangun dah! hehehe.. thanks for waking me up..

Good news, I'm going for holiday to Pulau Tioman this weekend.. can't wait to be there.. at last, dapat jugak pi pulau.. tapi nanti nak pi lagik, dengan orang tuh.. yea yea!

After hibernate nih, takde idea plak.. warm up jek nih..

Okaylah, see u all later, bile dh ade idea balik nanti...

Sunday, July 08, 2007

Time To Hibernate..



Assalamualaykum..

It's time for me to hibernate.. give me a week, and i will try to update this blog again.. or at least 5 days.. hehehe.. takut tak tahan lama2..

So, here we go......

...zzzzz.....zzzzz....zzzzz...

p/s: kawan2, my hp is still on tau.. so ape2 info, pls let me know thru sms or other means, okay.. Mr Sunshine, dgn awak saye tak hibernate ek.. ;-p ..

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Oh Happy Day.. :)


click picture for larger view

Assalamualaykum...

Happy sgt hari nih, sebab dapat jumpa dengan cikgu saye dulu mase kt SSP, yang saye dah anggap macam emak sendiri.. jumpa kejap pon takpe, sebab yang penting the precious moment that we share together.. tadi pi jumpa kat tempat yang selalu kitorang lepak mase skolah dulu, The Mall.. my adik angkat pon ikut skali.. si Echah tu dari jauh dah jerit "Kak Haniiiinnn.." isk.. malu malu.. orang sekeliling pandang jek sebab suara dia dah le stok menggegar alam, tambah pulak dgn gelak yang kuat tuh... hehehe! still bubbly macam dulu.. kelakar le makcik tuh...

Citer punye citer, terkeluar le kisah mase ade sorang kawan skolah saye mase dia kawen.. husband dia tuh pilihan keluarga. Kawan saye nih memang selamba n happy-go-lucky orangnye.. nak jadik cerita, mase hari dia kawen, dia sibuk dok mengendap kat pintu menunggu rombongan pengantin lelaki sampai, dgn pakai baju pengantin and siap mekap semua dah.. nampak jek keta rombongan sampai, dia pi menjerit kat seisi rumah.. "HOIIII..... PENGANTIN LELAKI DAH SAMPAI!!" Hahahaha! habis kena marah ngan orang2 tua.. dia lupa kot, dia yang jadik pengantinnye hari tuh... kitorang gelak terbahak2 kat kedai makan tadi... ade ke patut die jerit macam tu..

Insya Allah, 1st September nih batch saye akan buat gath besar2an kat skolah lama kami kat Jalan Kolam Ayer dulu... A lot of memories there, sure bertambah banyak le cerita yang timbul... really looking forward for that..

Okaylah, itu je kot hari nih.. bile adik saye dah balik UTM, laptop nih pon diangkut skali so probably saye akan hibernating for quite some time.. ingat nak pasang modem baru le kat PC saye tuh.. berapa ek seketul modem nowadays?

Till then, taking care la ye semua...


p/s: This is such a happy day for me.. :) walaupon pagi tadi frust sebab tak dapat buat medical check up lagi, semua dah fully booked kt KK Putrajaya nih.. seems like kena buat kat private jugak..
p/s: Mr Sunshine, enjoy yourself kat Penang tu ye.. takpe sorang2 pon, because actually u are not alone.. :)

Monday, July 02, 2007

Kenapa Mahu Menjadi Doktor?

Assalamualaykum...

A good article to be shared with all of u, especially yang ade kaitan dengan dunia perubatan (doctor ke, medical students ke, bakal pasangan doctor ke..)..
http://saifulislam.com/?p=402

Saturday, June 30, 2007

It's About Time..


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Assalamualaykum..


The offer letter from SPA just arrived today... at first, I was " oh my... dah kena start keja ke?".. but after opening it, no date stated yet... phew.... hehehe! In a way, rase berat jugak nak start keja after 2 months of enjoying life... kena buat medical check up pulak... isk.. macam nak masuk skolah or Univ. le pulak.. next week le..

Today also, is my bro, Hafiz's birthday.. he's 21 now. You've grown up le, bro! hehehe.. hope all the best things happen in your life, and semoga Allah permudahkan semua perkara le..

Last Monday (25th June), ade orang tuh sambut birthday jugak.. hehehe.. siyan dia, saye tak dapat nak beli hadiah pape lagi.. nanti le, 1st gaji nanti boleh tebus hadiah balik ek.. but, takde hadiah tak semestinya saye tak ingat ye... sorry, no flowery poem or wishes for you.. just a simple one which I created from my "berkarat" brain.. and heart.. and after all things that had happened, (yang tak berapa best tuh..) I think if we look at the positive side, it is not that bad.. at least we have extra time to do some savings, to adapt ourselves with both our career and also to strengthen our verses memorization.. hehehe.. 3 surah tu ingat dah ke? I myself pon tgh asah balik...

Tomorrow, my lil sis is registering in UTHM (previously known as KUITTHO) in Batu Pahat.. bila dia dah pergi, tinggal le saye and Adek with my parents kat rumah.. then next Sunday, Adek pulak dah start balik her Master prog kat UTM... erkk...! tinggal le saye solo2 kat rumah.. gosh, this is going to be very very discouraging. hehehe! takpelah, selagi orang tuh tak naik kapal, takde la sunyi sangat kot..

Well, banyak masa... banyak kerja.. tapi buat2 tak banyak.. isk..

Wal'asr.. innal insaana lafii khusr..

p/s: Shade, buku La Tahzan tuh mmg sangat berguna.. bile rase down or sedih, and baca buku tuh, rase macam bangun pagi after dah complete deliveries and case presentation mase kat O&G... thanx pal..

Friday, June 29, 2007

Sepi


Assalamualaykum...

Pernah tak rasa macam tu?
Rasa macam takde sape pon yang faham kite..
Takde tempat nak share problem..
Padahal ramai je kawan2 sekeliling...

Kadang2 pulak tuh...
Kite ingat kite sorang2...
Tapi rupe2nye ade jugak orang yg always ready..
Nak ngadu masalah ke, nak nangis kat dia ke..
Semua boleh.. just let them know..

Bertuahnya sebab masih ade orang yang sayang dan kisah kat kite...

p/s: sebenarnye kite tak pernah keseorangan, sebab Dia yang Maha Pengasih selalu ada untuk kite.. cuma kite je yang tak sedar.. teruk kan kite nih? harap belum terlambat...

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Getting Feedback

Assalamualaykum..

Okay tak blogskin yang nih? kalo boleh, tolong bagi komen ek...

Maaf...

Maaf ye..
Blog saye sdg update...
Banyak yang hilang...
Silap sendiri...

Another Friend...

Another friend of mine, his happiness means the whole world to me... hehehe..

p/s : kadang2, mengetahui bahawa seseorang itu sedang gembira dan bahagia pun sudah memadai... :) glad enough... Alhamdulillah...

A Friend..




Assalamualaykum...

This friend of mine really touched my heart today.. She sent me a scarf which she bought while doing Umrah last week... I was deeply touched by her remembrance.. and of course the notes that she wrote together with the scarf..

Actually, we have known each other since my matriculation days but I only got the chance to talk to her (chat lightly) when we were in 1st year in Kuantan... Our friendship became stronger when we were allocated in the same group during the Public Health and Family Med postings.. we struggled together with the journal searching stuff and knocked the villagers' doors to do the 'adventure' survey while in Jerantut.. and at that moment, I started to know her better, and I believe she felt the same way too...

Anyway, the moral of the story today is.... a person whom we never expect to remember us, sometimes they do touch our heart in a simple way.. :)


p/s: we share the same interest once, SUDOKU.. I introduced her to the game, she enjoys the game as I do and bought the original SUDOKU collections book.. well, I photocopied them for her... hahaha.. sweet memories of playing SUDOKU in the Psychiatry intro weeks..

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Mengenangmu..




Assalamualaykum...


Right now I am listening to a song, Mengenangmu by Keris Patih... yerp, it is an Indon song.. can't help it but I personally think songs by Indonesian singers are deeply touched my heart (chewah!)... nope, I am not trying to belittle Malaysia but that is my frank opinion..
So, do enjoy the lyrics, pal.. kalo nak dengar lagu dia, boleh let me know..



Takkan pernah habis air mataku
Bila ku ingat tentang dirimu
Mungkin hanya kau yang tahu
Mengapa sampai saat ini ku masih sendiri
Adakah disana kau rindu padaku
Meski kita kini ada di dunia berbeda
Bila masih mungkin waktu berputar
Kan kutunggu dirimu …


Reff:Biarlah ku simpan sampai nanti aku kan ada di sana
Tenanglah diriku dalam kedamaian
Ingatlah cintaku kau tak terlihat lagi
Namun cintamu abadi …


p/s: saye suke makan Fillet-o-Fish and ice cream McDonalds... hehehe.. but it would be much much more satisfying when eating it with the right person.. ade sentimental value.. isk..

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Post-Walimah (my big bro's)



Assalamualaykum...



Alhamdulillah, my big bro, Hazim dah jadi a husband last week.. akad nikah di Ipoh, Perak on 2nd June 2007 and kenduri sebelah pihak perempuan berlangsung petang tu jugak.. then, the next day pulak walimah kat my home... memang sangat meriah! it was more of a gathering event to my extended family members and friends of our family... about 1000 guests showed up and alhamdulillah, cuaca pon terang and just nice... elok jek majlis tamat and kitorang kemas2 barang kat khemah, hujan pon turun dengan lebatnye... so thanks to all yang datang sama2 memeriahkan majlis... perhaps next year punye pon boleh datang lagi ye... heh heh heh..

Rupa-rupanye, organize majlis kawen nih memang sangat memenatkan... seminggu sebelum majlis, me and my sisters memang tido lewat and buat preparation for the big day.. but frankly, altho penat sangat2 tapi cukup puas hati and tak serik sebab all the joy could be felt on that day.. cuma, memang ade rase terkilan and sayu sebab my younger bro, Apih, could not present.. tapi dia memang selalu call and even mase akad nikah pon, dia suruh taruk phone kat tepi my bro, Hazim so that he could hear the lafaz... hehehe... and the moment was so touched, thus making my mum to decide that the next wedding ceremony won't be held unless Apih was around... well, i kinda agree with that..

So, post-walimah, me and my sisters decided to be in 'coma' for 2 days... heheheh.. siap pesan kat my parents lagi, kalo kitorang tak bangun for 2 days tu, do not get worry... hehehe.. cakap je lebih tuh.. padahal, the next day kitorang dah berduyun2 pi Alamanda main bowling with the new husband-wife.. 16 org wooo main boilng.. kah kah kah.. sampaikan petugas kat bowling alley tuh pon kerumun tengok kitorang main... well, the sweat and tiredness were all gone, anyway...

Now, I am waiting for the call for work.. probably somewhere in July dah start kerja... hope I can be a safe one... kalo nak kate a good doctor, probably I have to wait for some time so that I can gain experience more and learn as much as I can in order to achieve that... and I've heard some of people out there once said that, the only time u can learn is during the student life.. after graduate from the school, u will be so busy to learn anything.. but as for me, life itself is a learning process so no such thing as 'no time to learn'.. I pray to Allah the Al-Mighty to make me strong to face all the tribulations and hardship... and grant me the strength to be steadfast with what I believe and what I hold...

Pray for me, please...



p/s: gambar kat friendster ye... nanti saye upload lagi..

Thursday, May 17, 2007

Love Chooses You..




If you find yourself in love with someone, and that someone does not love you... be gentle to yourself. there is nothing wrong with you, but love just did not choose to rest in that someone's heart...

If you find someone in love with you, and you cannot answer that love... feel honoured that love came by and called on your door... but gently refuse the feeling that you cannot return, as love did not choose to settle in your heart..

If you find yourself in love with someone and the love returned, it still can happen that love chooses to leave... do not try to reclaim it and do not assess any blame... let it go, despite the pain... there is a reason and meaning to this... you cannot choose love by yourself... LOVE CHOOSES YOU...

p/s : believe it or not, i have gone through all the three conditions above... and perhaps the 3rd one is the most painful.. kan Pakcik..?! but it's okay, because the decision has been achieved... be happy.. i know u will, because.... well, Allah the Al-Mighty know what is the best for us..